Mormonistic

 

 

  I was in debt the moment I was born into this church. For more than four decades since I took that first breath, I continued to fall further and further into debt. In debt to my parents. In debt to God. In debt to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Expected to give everything that I have and am, even laying down my life if necessary, for the church. At least, that is what I was taught. “…knoweth that ye are eternally indebted to your heavenly Father, to render to him all that you have and are…” Mosiah 2:34 An eternal debt that could never be repaid. No matter how much you do, you are never out of debt. There are many types of debt. By far, the most commonly understood debt is of the financial kind, but there are others. In systems where there is an exchange of value in one form or another there is the potential of creating a debt; for example, technical debt in software development or emotional debt in relationships. With regards to the church, it has not been in fi...

I had given my best.  I should not have been bound by the flaxen cords* of an adversary.  So I was told, such was I taught.  Far from perfect, I had given the best of what I had to offer. Was not the atonement there to take care of the rest? So I trusted what I was told. I did what was taught.  The plan was set forth with promised happiness to be found. You must lose yourself to find yourself, a better self, a selfless self…  to qualify as a godly self.  With eternity at stake and a line that must not be broken, my journey began down the path of covenants with the only consent that a mere child can give.  As I labored down that path laden with the expectations of generations past and future; there was no room for my own. With eternity on the line, to carry one’s own expectations would just be selfish. There is no time for your own needs in this life, no room for desires when there is so much work to be done and the salvation of so many others at stake....